You're at the Olympics in Greece, the Cannes Film Festival in France and the Leaning Tower of Pisa in Rome; The best part is....you haven't left your garage! Are these tips for where to go DO mushrooms or where to go ON mushrooms? I don't know let's take a few more mushrooms and find out shall we?
Space station ski trip: Grab a reflective emergency blanket, you know the ones. They look like ponds that go down to middle earth. It's weird cause you think space would be up, but it's really just in the blanket. Make sure if you are doing this in a public place...space station ski trip...you make sure to look inconspicuous and do something very mature...like promote your successful real estate business. As the people are running away make sure to scream at them you are sure you have some "listings" they would be interested in and make your hand look like a phone as you say "call me". These are things that will register with ground control which just happens to be communicating with you through your thoughts. Now grab the ski's and feel free to take off.
Gas station game show: If you are looking for something a little bit weirder, you can plant yourself on the side of a gas station and play "Who's. Your!" where the audience screams "Who's! Your!" Every time you get an answer correct. This game show begs the deepest questions of the Universe like "If God was a female baby and controlling your life with a joystick, what parts of your life would look no different than they do now?" One of the challenges in this game is to refrain from crying hysterically like someone has just exploded. When people walk past make sure to do something mature that tells them you are definitely NOT on mushrooms like talk about gas prices (Example: "Can you believe these gas prices...unbelievable!)
Hiding Goseek: If you want stay local, you and a group of friends can do mushrooms on a nearby trail and play a game you've termed Hiding Goseek. In this game you all huddle together in colorful anguish fretting about who is going to come around the corner. Will it be your boss, your mother, the Red Bull from the Red Bull container with or without wings. If people pass by make sure to act like you are having a business meeting...business as usual. Have very straight posture because serious people have very straight backs. Mention very loudly that your "business" meeting will "adjourn" shortly and you "don't wish to take any more of their time". Say "sir" three or four times to make sure they know you mean "business".
There are lots of hot places to go on mushrooms this year...geysers, hell, floating pancakes right off the skillet. The most important thing to remember is 1) Stay mature and 2) Be safe.
Man, my editors are hounding me to pump out these articles. Just kidding...we do this for free! So as part of your free entertainment today I am going to share some ways to get free stuff and free cash. If you are an experienced free-loader than you prob know some of these tricks. If you are just starting a career in trying not to have a career then let me enlighten you.
This site is amazing. It tracks how much I made vs how much I spent last month and then shows me comparisons with the nation. I earned rewards for taking certain steps and in a month my credit went up and they had deposited $20 bucks in my account. You get $5 just for signing up!
These take awhile to stack up before you hit the $10 mark (when money can be transferred to Paypal), but you are playing mindless games anyway...may as well make a little bit of money. Lucky Day was the one I used...you actually can win up to $1000 without even contributing a dime.
This site pays you take take surveys. It also pays you to buy stuff. Any time you sign up for something Xbox Live, Hulu or any subscription most likely you will find a money back offer through Swagbucks. I literally signed on for Hulu for one month and got $30 deposited through a promotion. I've made $30 in surveys alone which I had transferred to Paypal and $10 in Starbucks.
Here you sign on like a contract worker and proceed to fill out surveys to see what testing you qualify for. Currently, I am part of a test Amazon is running to find bugs in their Firestick software. Once a week I play around with the program and see if there's any delays or duel images or poor resolution...things like that. It pays weekly and I'll have $150 by the end of the five weeks.
SIGNING UP FOR BANK ACCOUNTS
If you need a quick 200-350 dollars you can sign up for a Chase or US Bank account that pays an initiation bonus once $500 has been direct deposited in your account.
I do not work for any of these agencies, I'm only promoting them in your favor. If you're looking for ways to add a few bucks in your down time...here they are.
Lastly, you can build a website with referral links like the ones I have provided and the companies will give you a dollar here, a dollar there for anyone that clicks on them. Thanks guy!
"Today for a craft I am going to share something that kind of happened on accident. You know those pleasant accidents that actually turn out into something half cool. When my son was one years old I was in a rehabilitation treatment center (TMI ALERT...for those of you who like to alienate the vulnerable...oh, oh turned it around on ya!) ten years ago. I didn't have a toy box for him so I grabbed an old box and we kept them there. As the years went on (and I was out of rehab) we put stickers over the ugly exterior. Now ten years later, it's actually kind of a memento to our travels and experiences. There are stickers from frozen pizza boxes we had, stickers from fancy coffee stands and record shops. Stickers from events and dentists offices and festivals. Now I have two kids and they both like to look at it and say "Hey, this one was from the time we went and saw Grandma over Christmas." It's a cool kind of scrap book/box that almost has more meaning then our books of photographs.
So here it is...it only took us ten years!
I imagine in another ten it will be completely covered!
This is very easy, you want a sizable box and tape it completely with clear packaging tape to hold the structure together. Then you begin sticking. Find stickers on walks, at parks and random places. After you are done, just for extra effect go ahead and apply some layers of hodge podge. Another idea: Once kids are grown turn this into your time capsule to burry and dig up in ten or twenty years. Listen to the oohs and aaahs as this baby resurfaces!
Welcome! I might be a little excitable from the surplus of Ketones surging through my body like rush hour on the 405 in downtown LA. It's bumper to bumper and this energy needs to flow so here we go!
Assuming you were here for part 1 of our pill series (if not you can always skip back a few blog post) you already have your homemade pill filler all ready to pop those empty caps into! For the second part you'll need gel caps (totes something you can make from scratch, but not really justifiably on time and cost) and whichever diet supplement, noopept or vitamin blend of choice.
You'll also want a scale.
Soooooooooo...funny story about that scale. When my friend and I did this the first time we used dopamine and we didn't have a scale. DON'T DO THAT. After eyeballing a random amount and adding Garcinia Cambogia he decided to act as guinea pig. As he was ingesting our concoction, I was reading the side effects on the bag of Dopamines. Well, if you take too much it can result in arms beginning to flail and loss of limb function. Whether it was power of suggestion or not measured out right, he started to feel a loss of arm function and couldn't seem to keep one of his arms from flapping about. He's still alive to this day, but that's just my way of saying, uh, proceed with caution.
Weigh amounts for consistency.
Test a little first.
And also the disclaimer: I ain't no doctor.
Vitamin and diet supplements are sold in quantity. As I demonstrated in my previous blog once weighed you can use one of those plastic spoon straws to fill the cap. This is an economic way to diet, it's fun and you can add unique blends customized to your dieting needs.
Some suggestions I have are:
Chromium Picolinate: Said to help with type 2 diabetes and developing lean muscle mass. Also, relatively safe.
Activated Charcoal: Well, you made charcoal with one of our other blogs, now it's time to eat it you brave DIYer. This stuff is detoxifying and said to help with weight loss and fatigue.
Raspberry Ketones: Aids in getting your body into Ketosis where you'll burn through your fat storage.
Lastly, read about the contents of your supplements before you order or combine them.
No, you're not going to have magical liquified candy coming out of the spigot, but you will have a candy container that looks quite cute and innovative. This is a fun idea for a summer wedding or just to put on the couch next to you to pretend you're a classy glutton.
I was able to purchase an Iced-Tea container for 10$ and another 10$ for the fill. Since the fill only last me 10 days, that's only 30$ a month! And I live alone!
It's very easy, but this is a DIY blog so I still need to break down the steps. I've included an easy link below to order everything online if you just have to have it now, otherwise a trip to Walmart or BigLots will easily yield the container and the candy.
Lighting a room the right way will add a richness to your whole experience: A soft glow under a bar, light emanating from crown molding reflecting off the ceiling or a back light for your TV viewing pleasure. It provides a nice glow to the room and, depending on the mood you are looking for, can be great for a nightlight or a party. These strips that you can easily string around a room or to the back of your monitor can be bought at retailers like Amazon (listed below). They are super cheap, but look pretty expensive and it's all something you can do on your own.
I have my TV set up with a nice white light, but you can also buy these in colors and changing colors. I have Jeopardy set up on my Firestick through Amazon Prime and it's fun to place with a group of friends with the added mood lighting giving it the enhanced game show quality. Have fun with it and feel free to comment if you come up with creative ways to use these that I haven't thought of!
It may not be easy to say to your family, "Hey let's have a game night!" especially if you are already playing games with each others minds, ifyaknowhati'msayin'. You are the mother that can't get your kids to listen, you are the father that feels like a 24/7 ATM, you're the kid that feels like you are neglected and yet you really don't want attention either.
What are your issues?
So once you've jotted down some ideas, here comes the fun part. Taking a new or used simple game of Jenga, we are going to literally be using these as the building blocks of your relationship. On these tiles you'll write 1) positive things to say about the other people 2) extraction words to get members to speak about their feelings and 3) fun activities as a buffer to some of the more serious dialogue. I use Fortnite as a good example because all the kids these days know the dance moves so if you have to peel your teenagers off of a game you can at least incorporate their obsession in this game. Write on a few of the blocks "Hype", "Orange Justice" or "Default dance" and get them engaging by showing you the moves. Believe me, they seem to be hypnotized to do these on command. Some of your more vocal blocks might include words or phrases like "What bothers you?" or "I don't like it when _____". Then you will also do positivity blocks such as "Name a good quality about _______." In this game it is against the rules to react to what one person says unless you get the "Freak Out" tile and then you can let loose.
You've got a tattoo with your exes name on it. Your ex was a professional POS like literally had a business card that read "Asshole for Hire". It was that same confidence in being an asshole that attracted you to him in the first place...you got problems too. Anyhoo, now Cliff (I know, what a name! Sounds exactly where you feel like disposing of the body) has a place securely on your left boob forever. You could get it lasered and have a nebulous scar or you could get some bigger splatter to make it look like he doesn't matter, but why not use your tit to badvertise what a real piece of shit he was. For just pennies (Well, it sounds good, like you're doing a service for women everywhere) you can add a message, a public service announcement if you will, to broadcast what exactly Cliff is all about. Here are some words and phrases you can add to a tattoo so you know you can insure you have the last say.
(Cliff)"IS STUPID" - Well, isn't he? He left you. You who treated him right. You who paid the pills. You who did sweet things on Holidays. He had a free ride and he fucked it up. What an idiot!
"I GOT FUCKED OVER BY" (Cliff) "AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TIT TATTOO" - Very honest.
(Cliff)"HAS A SMALL PENIS" - This doesn't have to be true, but no one will ever know the truth and it will plant a question in their mind as to whether or not he really does have a micro-thingy.
Lots to work with here and depending on your bra size you could fit a whole sentence! Have fun with Cliff, the kind of fun you wish you'd had with him, but never got the chance. Asshole.
Are you sick of planning all the dates? Do you feel like the only interesting or better yet interest-ed party in your party of two? Maybe it's time to lead your partner towards a little thing called self-drive. The thing is that you are so used to coming up with the ideas that you are now pigeonholed as the planner. Wah-wah. Studies show the best way to get your sig other to change is by manipulating them into thinking said change is their idea (What study you ask? Me studying your ass, this is a parody site I can do W.T. Fuck I want!) In effect the best way to reverse the roles and get them to squeeze out a miniscule, pebble of an idea you have to learn how to fake a boregasm. A boregasm is the opposite of an orgasm, instead of joy you are experiencing pain...they do, however, sound EXACTLY the same.
First you'll want to play a few rounds of "What do you want to do tonight". After six to eight "I don't know, what do you want to do tonight's" you are ready to begin the moanage. Hold your lips agape and with the back of your throat you'll do a chant-like "Aaahhhhhhh". At first he will be alarmed, thinking you have been hurt. In response you will give him a look like "Got any real answers". When he doesn't respond because his resource center is still backed up, you'll let out a long "Uhhhhhgggggggggggggggg" Shake your head once you've pinched off your sigh as to appear completely disappointed in your choice of partner. Then be silent. In this moment of silence they will be assessing what just happened. It will give them time to think back to what triggered such an extreme response. When they come back they will have a lame idea. Now you'll want to flail onto the floor and act like you're having a mini-seizure meanwhile saying "No, no, no, no, no" Now they will feel the pressure to come up with something good AND fast. It doesn't matter what it is going to cost or what they have to do, they are willing just to get you to stop. If you do it right you might even get to go to the Escape Room or some other novelty date that lame partners usually HATE.
When I was working at a restaurant in Salt Lake I was dating a musician that liked to drop off apples for me to smoke out of. We had to be discrete so I could get in a midday puff and it was his way of being sweet and letting me know he was thinking about me. Anyway, here's a few discrete's so you can drop a bowl for your sweetheart or just improvise in a crisis.